Month: November 2011

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    let me start by saying i spent half the night dreaming i couldn't get my doc marten's off, and woke up with my stuffed tiger jammed up under my ribs (i'm still sore from it, invisible strings that pull at my abs when i move). the other half of the night's journey was doled out to you, in a fashion that was really spectacularly unfair, because the explanations you always seem to offer in my dreams are so soothing that i wake up confused and twisted around in the sheets, having to explain to myself that none of it was real.

    and so all day i've been walking around with a sick stomach, though i'm sure it's 80 percent gingerbread latte and 10 percent pine-sol absorbed through my bare feet, but i know ten percent relates directly back to those dreams, which besides chatting with you and fighting my boots involved rooming with jessica and avery, a man wanting to withdraw 8 million dollars, and a serious tsunami at hampton beach which i was trying to drive away from.

    and now this, because i know you'd hate it:

  • i don't know that i have anything to say. life is good, apart from the nightmares, though it all breaks down to lather rinse repeat.

    i just want... this feeling back:

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    of being secure, anticipation. full heart.

    watching DH part 1 didn't help at all.

    well, here's what i love best just now:

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    my mother claims not to have stolen this tape from me when i was a child, but honestly, how many times could you hear it before you went nuts??

    and lastly:

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    that is all. carry on.